For those who thought the hardest part of Physics 101 was the constant conversion from feet and inches to the metric system, including all its Newtons, Joules, and Watts, here are some other useful conversions:

 

Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter:

Eskimo Pi

 

2000 pounds of Chinese soup:

Won ton

 

1 millionth of a mouthwash:

1 microscope

 

Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement:

1 bananosecond

 

Weight an evangelist carries with God:

1 billigram

 

Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour:

Knot-furlong

 

365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it's less filling:

1 lite year

 

16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone:

1 Rod Serling

 

Half of a large intestine:

1 semicolon

 

0.014 pounds of ground grain:

1 millistone

 

20 girlfriends in college:

1 score

 

9 inches of mystery meat:

1 spam

 

1000 pains

1 kiloahurtz

 

Basic unit of laryngitis:

1 hoarsepower

 

The power to launch one ship:

1 milliHelen

 

Shortest distance between two jokes:

A straight line

 

454 graham crackers:

1 pound cake

 

1 million microphones:

1 megaphone

 

1 million bicycles:

2 megacycles

 

2000 mockingbirds:

two kilomockingbirds

 

10 cards:

1 decacards

 

1 kilogram of falling flgs:

1 Fig Newton

 

1000 milliliters of wet socks:

1 literhosen

 

1 millionth of a fish:

1 microfiche

 

1 trillion pins:

1 terrapin

 

10 rations:

1 decoration

 

100 rations:

1 C-ration

 

2 monograms:

1 diagram

 

8 nickels:

2 paradigms

 

2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital:

1 I.V. League

 

100 Senators:

Not 1 decision